Planning a wedding can be one of the most exciting times in your life – and one of the most stressful. From choosing the perfect attire, coordinating with vendors, staying within budget and navigating input from family and friends there are countless worries to toss on top of your no-doubt already stressful day-to-day.
Though it may feel like an endless and overwhelming list of to-dos is looming in the next few months or weeks, this is actually a fleeting time in your life that you will want to look back on with fond memories. When you put your mental health first, everything else becomes easy, and perfecting your big day is no exception. Instead, many brides enter the process unprepared, falling victim to their own overwhelm and anxiety and right into the stereotype of Bridezilla.
Not to add any more unnecessary pressure, but now that you’ve said “Yes”, you have actually already begun the transition into the next phase of your life. So let’s make sure to usher you into this new era (and extended family) with the same preparedness, confidence and grace that future you will look back on proudly.
Here are 5 key ways to create a low-stress foundation to planning an amazing wedding — and start off your marriage on the right foot.
1. Create a clear vision first.
Once you’ve established your vision, stay committed to your intuitive plan.
Your vision is the solid foundation upon which your entire wedding is built. Once that foundation is set and clear to you and everyone you involve, the tasks that follow become much easier to execute. Keeping your vision at the forefront of your mind when approaching wedding planning tasks helps you stay committed to your plan and limits unneeded stress. This is especially helpful when financial decisions are in play.
This is important to take your time on first, because everything else is made easier by YOU committing to this vision –more to come in number 5 below.
2. Create a schedule with sustainability in mind.
Create a manageable routine of searching, scheduling, spending, and planning to prevent last-minute scrambling, overwhelm, and burnout.
Give yourself a reasonable timeline once you understand the vision. The keyword here is manageable. Chances are, you didn’t quit your day job to put on this shindig, so be kind and realistic with yourself about your energetic capabilities. Create a schedule that’s realistic and reasonable for you, allows you to stay up-to-date with what’s happening, what’s needed, and what’s next while also still juggling the crazy life that existed before wedding planning became a thing.
3. Don’t do this alone!
Ask for help and delegate tasks to your support group.
Yes, this is your day but it’s also the day that those who love you most look forward to celebrating you. Allow them to. Lean on your community to help with tasks and logistics to lower your workload. From DIY floral arrangements to the DJ setlist, your favorite people would love to jump in and support you wherever you need to take some of the stress off of you ahead of your big day. You just have to ask.
4. Have a practice of regular movement.
And no, not to fit into the dress!
There’s no energy boost and stress relief quite like a kitchen dance party. We store a lot of our stress in our physical bodies, and that tension can build up quickly. Forget the body shaming that creeps up during this time. Know instead that moving your body regularly can help decrease some of that tension and release endorphins, a hormone that helps reduce stress and improves overall well-being.
5. Do not fall victim to comparison.
This is your day, don’t let FOMO ruin it for you.
In this digital age, there’s always something shiny vying for our attention and admiration. This can often lead to frequent comparison and FOMO (the fear of missing out), sometimes without us even realizing it. Don’t let comparison eat away at your happiness and excitement during this magical time. This is where your vision will come in strong.
Trust yourself and know that your initial planning instincts were everything you wanted and they are enough. If you find yourself stuck in comparison, revisit your vision and let that guide you and remind you of the amazing wedding ahead of you.
Remember: your wedding is a big day, but it’s not life or death. The wedding planning process can be just as happy and memorable as the day if you plan properly. Take a deep breath, high five yourself for starting this phase of your life, and start that vision board.
Lindsey Paoli, MS MFT
The MIND Performance Coach
The MIND Performance Coach, Lindsey Paoli, MS MFT, MFTI, CPCI is pre-licensed therapist, a bestselling author, keynote speaker and national expert news contributor. She is the creator of The MIND Fundamental Formula, a signature protocol rooted in neuroscience to create and sustain mental health through the daily practice of habits to improve neuroplasticity, cognition and focus, distress tolerance, and compassion. She consults with high achieving leaders, entrepreneurs, and businesses of all sizes to improve performance both at work and at home through the prioritization of mental health prevention and wellbeing.